Since coming home from my visit with my Dad, I find I am filled with a great sense of contentment. I have always been the one who has tried to prove I could 'have my cake and eat it too'. I took the statement, "You can do anything You put my mind to", very literally. I have always fully believed that to be true and have spent the first 30 odd years of my life trying to do it all.
In high school I was involved with basketball, yearbook, students council, badminton, cross country running, S.A.D.D, (but I think it was called something else), and somewhere in there I managed to pass my classes, hold on to a boy friend, attend most football games, carry a job and hang out with my friends. I remember my dear mother trying to tell me that I was doing too much and something would have to give...hummm, maybe I could have earned A's instead of B's and C's...
Then I moved away from home, got married and had three wonderful children. Still trying to help out at church, have wonderful birthday parties for each one of my sweet darlings, babysit other peoples children, write, keep up with laundry, and occasionally homeschool my children, work full time, take care of chickens and sheep, remember date night, renovated our home, attend all of Jacob's Dr. appointments and be a good wife, mother, friend, daughter, sister, aunt and neighbour.
I have always been on the watch for the next project, something I could throw myself into and feel I was doing enough. Something that would fulfill my need to prove I could do hard things.
I am still working through why I have felt this way and what has changed. But what I want to share is the joy that comes from just being still. Still enough to listen and to hear what it is you really want to be doing. What is it that really brings you joy and contentment? If we stop running around in circles trying to keep busy, doing what we think others want or need us to do, if we can carve out some quiet time in our lives where the T.V, MP3 players, cell phones and computers are turned off, we will be amazed at what we hear.
I have spent the last few weeks creating a chicken coup and yard. I have calmly and quietly, built the nesting boxes out of old 2X4's and have enjoyed every minute of it. My family is still alive. They have eaten and have clean clothes on their backs. Because you know what? When we stop and listen to that inner voice and do what it says, we have more energy and desire to do ALL that needs doing.
I have signed up for an online writing course. It feels so good to be taking another look at my book. I love reading others ideas and suggestions about ways I can improve it. It feels great to be taking myself seriously.
I have spent some mornings just standing watching my chickens...I LOVE my chickens! They make me so happy!
I have just about finished organizing the basement and the laundry is all caught up! I feel I am doing less and getting more done. I am NOT trying to accomplish someone elses To Do list, just my own and it is working!
There is a power in trusting ourselves. I think for a long time the world has been telling us that we should have it all, do it all and be it all. I believe we can, but not the way the T.V commercials show it to be. We can HAVE all we need to be happy today, just by opening our eyes and seeing the blessings that are right in front of us.
We can DO all we need to be content if we stop trying to keep up with everyone else and begin living our own life.
We can BE our very best self when we take the time to be still and find out what that looks like and trust ourselves enough to follow through.
I have never been happier!
I hope you can take the time to be still day! I plan to.