I am a great list and note maker. I make all kinds of lists, groceries to goals. I also write myself notes, notes about how the day went, memories I want to remember and notes to get myself motivated. Sounds strange perhaps, but it works for me. My dear husband is always making some comment about the trees I could save if I would stop, but it is what helps me to accomplish what needs to be done.
I am working on a pretty big goal of mine these days. I am hoping to travel Canada with my children in search of wheel chair accessibility and I would also LOVE to meet other families who have a family member with different abilities and talk about what is working for them and what is not. Of course I would blog about it and maybe even write a book. Maybe a spot on CBC radio?...or published in a magazine. Something to get the message and hope out to others. It is a huge dream for me. When I had Jacob almost 11 years ago, I was a mess. Life turned upside down for me. Mostly because I had No idea what I was doing. There were some amazing people that came into our life around that time that really helped me get a grip! I would love to help others who might need a little support. I have also found that there is great power that comes when we meet others who are in our same situation and can share our worries and our triumphs with each other.
Just the other day I met a mom who has a child who has many of the same abilities as my Son, Jacob and who has graduated from university! You can't even imagine the hope that that gave me. I was so grateful to this wonderful woman who shared her story with me and gave me a hug to boot! We were two strangers and with in ten minutes had laughed and cried together.
Well anyway, this is the goal I am working on and it is a tricky one. I figure I need a pretty big chunk of change to make it work. An accessible van would be nice too, but this all requires me putting myself out there and asking...this is hard to do. I have this nagging voice in my head that likes to say things like, "Who do you think you are?" "You're not qualified to take this on." or "NO one wants to talk to you anyway."
So in comes the notes of motivation to myself. But I have to say that even they aren't working right now.
Well this morning I got up and headed to the washroom to see what kind of damage the 'sand man' had done over night and there on the counter was one of my little note books that I had written in. It was open to a spot where I had written, "I am beginning to wonder if I am a scaredy cat..." and then a list of things I need to do to begin this adventure of mine. Underneath, in my sweet daughter's hand writing was written, "I love you Mom. Mom you are not a scaredy cat, you are the world! A role model. A mother! A brave, strong, amazing woman that has nothing to be afraid of. I love you. Our joys are our wings!"
I love this girl of mine. If I do nothing else in my life, knowing that I have helped to raise such an amazing person will be enough. (and I have 3 amazing young people, how did I get so blessed?) So I have new found strength and courage. I must get past the planning stage and on to the doing...that is the scariest place to be! But With encouragement and love like that, how can I go wrong?
I hope you have a noteworthy day and that you might find you wings! I plan to.
Thank you Mackenzie.